- Write a blog about envy
- Write a blog about: Forgiveness is more than saying sorry, but it's also more than saying I forgive you
- Write a blog about wanting
Which would any of you like most so I know which to work on first?
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Upcoming Blog Topics
I haven't forgotten about my blog. I've been wrapped up in some things recently, but I hope to start typing regularly. Here are some upcoming topics I've been mulling over:
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Figuring out a Dream
As far as what I want out of life I'm pretty simple. My main goal is to be genuinely happy, with both myself and with the life that I live.
As far as dreams go, I haven't necessarily had any long reaching ones. Every little girl wants to be famous at some point right? And I can still write a book when I'm retired. I can even get into fashion, makeup, or photography through venues such as Youtube or Deviant art. All of those dreams were nice, but they weren't very motivating for some reason. One could say they weren't really my true dream, and I wouldn't argue. Recently, due to my Learning Strategies Class, I've been pondering what could possibly be my real dream. Having a wonderful loving family, that's a given and is in my near future. But as for what to do after that, I had no idea, nor did I know if I even wanted to do anything after that.
But there was always something else on my mind. There was always another dream slowly emerging from the pit of my subconscious. I've thought of it before, but I never gave it much credit because it didn't fit with anything I'd ever considered before. "Why does that matter though?", I asked myself today. "It's still possible." The more I thought about it the more I realized it seems like something I'd really enjoy being a part of. So, I'm adding it to my little list of dreams and maybe someday I'll make it a reality.
You may be dying to know what this new dream could be. It's semi-personal, so I won't reveal too many details but the short of it is this: I'm currently working through some issues. My dream in regards to these issues is to one day be happy and healthy, but I'm just one person. There are millions more people just like me who have these very same issues, that are striving to be healthy too. So it hit me. What if I were to share my story with these people? What if I could possibly give even one person the motivation they needed to get better? I know there are days when it seems completely pointless, like I'm fighting an up hill battle, but when I read the success stories of people who won that battle it always gives me an extra shove towards my goal. It restarts the fire and I know that it's not hopeless, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I want to add my name to that list of success stories.
I want to educate the public on this very prevalent disorder, and I want to build a support network for those who are healing. It would involve both people who are in progress and people who have made it, so they can each give each other the love and support they desperately need in their battle against themselves. I want it to be personal, and I want it to be intimate. A lot of the sites out there that have piles and piles of information, but no one to talk to, and no actual person to give advice. I want it to be a close nit community, where everyone can feel loved, comfortable, safe, and most of all, like they can trust each other. After all, it would be comprised of people who share common ground; people who are struggling and people who have struggled.
I want to go and do seminars at schools or other local venues and talk about my story, and the story of everyone else who has to struggle. I want to be a guiding light to those people who are stuck in the darkness that is their disorder. I know I can't change anyone, and I don't want to do that. I merely want to make myself available for a model, or at least for a source of information to those who want it (I would never think of forcing anyone to do anything, and a lot of people don't want or aren't ready for help, and that's perfectly fine).
I know that it'll take a while to get to a place where I can help people, because right now I personalize things too much and I end up triggering when I discuss these things with other people, but I know it's a definite outcome of my constant struggle. I know that I can be healthy and happy, and I want all the other people who suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder to know they can be too.
I'm not ashamed that I have a personality disorder.
I'm not angry that I have it.
I'm not sad that I have it.
I don't let it control who I am.
I don't let it dictate what I do.
I don't let it hold me back.
And neither should anyone else.
As far as dreams go, I haven't necessarily had any long reaching ones. Every little girl wants to be famous at some point right? And I can still write a book when I'm retired. I can even get into fashion, makeup, or photography through venues such as Youtube or Deviant art. All of those dreams were nice, but they weren't very motivating for some reason. One could say they weren't really my true dream, and I wouldn't argue. Recently, due to my Learning Strategies Class, I've been pondering what could possibly be my real dream. Having a wonderful loving family, that's a given and is in my near future. But as for what to do after that, I had no idea, nor did I know if I even wanted to do anything after that.
But there was always something else on my mind. There was always another dream slowly emerging from the pit of my subconscious. I've thought of it before, but I never gave it much credit because it didn't fit with anything I'd ever considered before. "Why does that matter though?", I asked myself today. "It's still possible." The more I thought about it the more I realized it seems like something I'd really enjoy being a part of. So, I'm adding it to my little list of dreams and maybe someday I'll make it a reality.
You may be dying to know what this new dream could be. It's semi-personal, so I won't reveal too many details but the short of it is this: I'm currently working through some issues. My dream in regards to these issues is to one day be happy and healthy, but I'm just one person. There are millions more people just like me who have these very same issues, that are striving to be healthy too. So it hit me. What if I were to share my story with these people? What if I could possibly give even one person the motivation they needed to get better? I know there are days when it seems completely pointless, like I'm fighting an up hill battle, but when I read the success stories of people who won that battle it always gives me an extra shove towards my goal. It restarts the fire and I know that it's not hopeless, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I want to add my name to that list of success stories.
I want to educate the public on this very prevalent disorder, and I want to build a support network for those who are healing. It would involve both people who are in progress and people who have made it, so they can each give each other the love and support they desperately need in their battle against themselves. I want it to be personal, and I want it to be intimate. A lot of the sites out there that have piles and piles of information, but no one to talk to, and no actual person to give advice. I want it to be a close nit community, where everyone can feel loved, comfortable, safe, and most of all, like they can trust each other. After all, it would be comprised of people who share common ground; people who are struggling and people who have struggled.
I want to go and do seminars at schools or other local venues and talk about my story, and the story of everyone else who has to struggle. I want to be a guiding light to those people who are stuck in the darkness that is their disorder. I know I can't change anyone, and I don't want to do that. I merely want to make myself available for a model, or at least for a source of information to those who want it (I would never think of forcing anyone to do anything, and a lot of people don't want or aren't ready for help, and that's perfectly fine).
I know that it'll take a while to get to a place where I can help people, because right now I personalize things too much and I end up triggering when I discuss these things with other people, but I know it's a definite outcome of my constant struggle. I know that I can be healthy and happy, and I want all the other people who suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder to know they can be too.
I'm not ashamed that I have a personality disorder.
I'm not angry that I have it.
I'm not sad that I have it.
I don't let it control who I am.
I don't let it dictate what I do.
I don't let it hold me back.
And neither should anyone else.
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